Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Nothing to blog and blogging it

I've been really busy over the past week or so, to the point of multi-tiered to-do lists and little to no downtime. I don't thrive on this the way some people do. I get irritable and cry easily. I cried yesterday for a dumb reason. Upside is, I like crying. Crying is awesome because it makes you feel better with no real side effects, unlike, say, drinking or comfort-eating, or even scratching an itch.

Remember that "25 Random Things About Me" Facebook meme from like 2008? Well I don't, because I'mnotonFacebook. But here are <25 "random" things "about" me:
  • People constantly make fun of the way I walk. I walk quickly, but I take short steps and don't lift my feet much off the ground. Picture a mechanical geisha.
  • I have frequent anxiety dreams that "everybody hates me," guess-I'll-go-eat-worms-style. Seriously, people I haven't seen since high school will show up just to hate me.
  • I've got a fang. Actually just one wicked crooked tooth, whereas all the others are straight. I tend to forget about it until I see pictures of myself, because I don't smile at myself in the mirror. Jesus, does anyone? (<--Stand By Me reference.)
  • I'm terrible at skating, both roller- and ice-. I'm shaky on a bike too. I like to have my feet on the ground. (Hence the aforementioned shuffling.)
  • I am, however, good at racket sports, especially racquetball and ping-pong.
  • In college I wrote a poem that ended with the lines, "I'm always turning corners with you. / Why can't we take the hypotenuse?" Uh, what? In high school I wrote a poem that ended with the line "This time Jonah ate the whale." It was about a kid named Jonah who murdered his parents (true story). Uhhhh. Another poem I wrote in college had these lines, which I still think are good: "That wasn't a blackbird, / just a black bird. But I couldn't tell you no." Confess your terrible lines! Or your good ones.
  • When I was in ninth grade I posted a bunch of poems to a user group in AOL. My email address was FreakGirl@aol.com. Confess your awesomely terrible former email addresses!
  • When I was five or so I had both a security blanket, which I called my "night-night," and a security toy, a little monkey that was part fur and part plastic. The paws and mouth were plastic, and you could lodge his little thumb in his mouth. I called him Chunky. I couldn't sleep without my night-night and Chunky. I also had a traditional baby doll that I carried around by the head, so it kept falling off.
I think I'm sufficiently embarrassed/catharted now.


  1. i haven't seen Stand By me, but i know a TMBG reference when i see one. "I've got a fang." :)

  2. Ha, well done! You should rent Stand By Me. But first, you should go back in time, because it's better when you're 10.

  3. by the way, i was guruswamy1 at aol. i got the name from a byline in a newspaper. i thought it was hilarious.

    i must have IMed half a dozen girls back then who had some variation of "freakgirl" as her screenname.

  4. Yes I'm sure you knew Freakgirl15 and freakygirl27 but I was the original. Oh yes, that was me.

  5. My HS email was freakshow, actually it was freaksho cause of the 8 char limit

  6. Ha, I forgot about that. Reminds me of Adam's old email, snoweasl@

  7. Kleptography@cs.com

    That's doubly embarrassing, not just a bad pseudonym but a compuserve e-mail address.

  8. Ha! Compuserve is so lame I think it actually comes back around to out-awesome AOL.

  9. hoy hoy
    I think I had that monkey toy!

    Was he wearing a yellow vest that said "Rodney Needs Love"?

    I was 'ThesaurusRex@yahoo' for a while a few years back.
    Dark days....

  10. Thesaurus Rex! Yowza. That should be a kid's show.

    My monkey wasn't wearing a vest, but maybe I removed it?? His name warn't Rodney though.

  11. I used to be Nightgowngirl@AOL (Anne Sexton). I thought it was weirdly sexy. But as someone pointed out, you would first need to think that nightgowns are sexy.

  12. I wish I cried. I only cry when I gain too much weight.

  13. Getting fat makes me depressed in a non-crying kind of way. Too bad, crying probably burns calories.

  14. Cry easy with a fang? Seeking catharsis through writing? Perfect:)

    Great post; thoughtful poetry; nice blog!

  15. neuroticme@yahoo.com. I still use it every now and then.