Thursday, October 27, 2011


There's been a trend going on for a while of extreme fast food in which one type of greasy sandwich is embedded in another. People think the interesting thing about wave-particle duality is that light can act like a particle. But what most Scrabble players don't realize is that the highest-scoring move is frequently not the biggest word, but a play involving multiple shorter words. In my mind, it's a sudden shift to a different worldview, as palpable as suddenly getting a foot taller.

Why is camouflage moving backwards, becoming lower-res? Nobody knows how homing pigeons work. If you were an American girl of the middle class persuasion in 1988, you probably wanted to be either Stacy Ferguson or Jennifer Connelly from The Labyrinth. I think the decade was defined by 9/11, but what were the ramifications of that, aside from fear and jingoism? A little cross-contamination is inevitable in restaurants, but at the end of the week/month/life, you've eaten a lot fewer dead animals. Anyway, coherence isn't really crucial in a pop song. It's not like they ever start packing people into the aisles.

Do some people really believe that everything is about sex? Of course this bias trickles down and bleeds into the articles in subtle and not-so-subtle ways. You know when you get a girl crush? The theory compared first-person games to being on drugs, wherein things that appear simple are actually quite difficult. I mean that is classic freshman overactive anxiety of influence right there. There are no happy short stories. What right have you to go and die?

It's true: northern hipsters have started a pro-littering campaign. Ashbery is a living contemporary writer! Apparently it's a staple at Midwestern potlucks; it belongs there right alongside the tater tot hotdish. I don't know the context, but doesn't this violate the basic rule of logic that for any given property A, a thing cannot be both A and not A? The "neg" is overrated, and arguably can't even be classed as flirtation. This will henceforth serve as my go-to example of a bad poem.


  1. Ha, excellent! (Word verification = "proso.")

  2. I actually kind of like this "bad" poem; if you cut the last sentence I think it cld work rather well.

    "What right have you to go and die?" strikes me as a as a strong "line."

  3. LOL the above comment is from me, adam strauss or adams24 or whatever the googleprofile name is.

  4. Actually, it seems to me that the instance of light being both a wave and a particle could be said to be an example of a thing being both A and not-A.

    Word verification is "grachies." Sounds like it could be a kind of hip latter-day shortening of "congratulations." E.g., "Hey, Peep, grachies on being both A and not-A."

  5. A-not-A--trip back to highschool and, I think, a history teacher briefly mentioning Derrida; or maybe it was an English teacher; or no must have been both.

    Grachies remindsme of grouches too; but yah LD I agree with your reading.

    Biased thought: is it just me or is eastcoast slang inferior to elsewhere? I'm really not well-versed enough to make this claim. And besides: the best is Elizabethan. Which is not an endorsement of mysogyny except, agh, with hell and nothing that's sorta bs of me. If I appear the wretch, please get rid of this.

  6. Midwestern slang is best, ever.


  7. Light is a wave, it just sometimes behaves in a particle-like fashion. (You could say the same thing about all matter!) So I don't think it really violates the rule.

    When I hear "eastcoast slang" the only thing I can think of is "wicked." As in "wicked pissa"

  8. Oh wow wicked is eastcoast? I did not know that!

    TPeterson: I have little/no knowledge of midwestern slang--despite growing up for many years in Louisville--which I wld say is for sure not southern.

    adam s

  9. "Wicked" is specifically Boston I believe. Just ask a New Kid.

  10. I think of light-being-wave-and-particle as analogous to person-being-banker-and-douchebag. The notions are different but they're not mutually exclusive. For instance a soliton is intuitively both a wave (being a wave) and a particle (being a rigid clump-like thing).

  11. Hi, Elisa. Sounded like Whimsy on a riff :) I like to think that A-Not-A is sometimes a matter of the phenomenon in question not resolving itself yet. Like "am I really in love?" or some other quantum consideration. I am always a little surprised to remember that all those states to the east and north mainly are The Midwest. Even Wisconsin. of course, they DO all have potlucks, and would make perfectly cast characters on A Prairie Home Companion.

    Verification word is sproffl.

  12. Is Schrodinger's cat in love? I should have clarified: something cannot be A and not A in a single universe. The multiverse is a different story!