Friday, May 10, 2013

Tale of a Thursday elopement

Yesterday started off as a pretty normal day ... except that it was raining. In Colorado?! So ironic! (Alanis was right.)

Things got a little weird around 3, when we headed down to the county clerk office to pick up this phony-looking Old West–style thing:


We had a little time to kill before our 5:15 appointment with the judge, so we swung by Beast & Bottle on 17th for a little liquid courage.


The bartender there used to work at Encore – our favorite spot in Denver before it closed – and called out, "Hey, Boston!" when we walked in.

The sun came out just in time.


Phew, irony-free wedding.


The judge was super nice. Whole thing took about ten minutes. I cried!

Then a funny little security guard who didn't know how cameras work took our picture:


We took advantage of the evening light and got a celebratory drink on the roof of the MCA.


Then we went to our favorite sushi place. It was delicious.

So, yep, we're married now.


Quick FAQ:

  • Please please don't anyone feel left out. We literally decided to get married on Monday, made the arrangements on Tuesday and told only our families. There was no one at the ceremony but us. But we love you all and want to celebrate with you when we see you.
  • No, we're not registered anywhere! We're also not going on a honeymoon and we don't have wedding bands yet ... I do have a lovely family ring from the Cotters that I'm going to wear once it's resized for my elfin fingers.
  • No, I'm not pregnant, really.
  • One of my most viewed blog posts is "Why I don't want to get married." In principle, I still believe all that. I also don't think our relationship will be functionally different in any real way; we've lived together for 6+ years. Here's what tipped the balance: John has been having some pretty serious health issues. If he should ever take a turn for the worse, I want to be sure I have the legal rights to see him in the hospital, make decisions, etc. I'm not getting any younger here either. So I want to be sure that the various powers that be see our relationship the same way we do, and (unfortunately) that requires making it legal. These aren't the happiest, most romantic circumstances in the world, I know, but we made the most of it anyway.
  • I guess I have to start calling John my husband now?! I've never liked the words "husband" and "wife," but oh well: "boyfriend" sounded pretty infantalizing. 
  • I know my perfume people will be curious: I wore Sweet Redemption. John wore Chergui. 


50 comments:

  1. You can call each other "spouse" if you prefer. Martin favors "spouse-person." Also? Congratulations, you crazy kids!!!

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    1. How about "spouse-a-tron"? (Spouse sounds like a medical term, I don't think I can go there)

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    2. Really? I think spouse is a really cute word. Spouse-O-tron, maybe? Spouse-face?

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    3. Spouse-mouse? Little too close to "spore," maybe.

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  2. Congrats!

    Spontaneous weddings are the only way to get married in my book. That's what we did as well. Most people were OK with it or at least didn't tell me that they felt left out. I did have to explain that I wasn't pregnant for the next year though. Oh, well.

    AND call him/introduce him as your lover. It makes everyone feel really grotty and uncomfortable. It's great.

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    1. Best recommendation ever! Thank you V!

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  3. Just what I needed - happy news on a rainy, stress-filled day. Thanks for sharing your great news. Congratulations!!

    PS You both look fantastic and smell terrific!

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    1. Thanks so much! I didn't have time to stress about what I would wear; I happened to have a new dress in the closet that I bought to wear to a friend's wedding. So what the heck, I wore it to my own.

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  4. Ha, congratulations! I owe you a drink... (I find the medical-visit reason v. compelling. Hope it turns out to be a needless caution of course)

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    1. Me too! (I think I mentioned to you I'll be in Boston later this month, so I'll take you up on that offer!)

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    2. Yes! And (according to current plans) I'll be in Boulder most of July, so I might run into you in your new lair at some point then.

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    3. Oh, awesome!! What will you be doing in Boulder?

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    4. Long workshop/summer school. In truth, a grueling exercise in networking!

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    5. Well if you must network, at least you'll be in the presence of mountains and craft beer.

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  5. Congratulations! I admire the no-fuss approach too.

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  6. Congrats Elisa.. the French Exit guy said once somewhere it was brave to get married

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  7. Congratulations, Elisa, on doing it your way and for your own reasons. My husband and I were together for 23 years before we decided to marry. It was a back yard wedding with a Justice of the Peace and about six friends. That was in May, 2004. In the following June, we staged a wedding for family members, at my sister's house, which everyone seemed to enjoy. Trouble is, I can never remember my true anniversary date, because of the "two" weddings. :-D

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    Replies
    1. Funny! We've always celebrated our "anniversary" in August on the day we met ... perhaps now we'll celebrate both? Thank you!

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  8. Oops--meant to say: I loved your photos!

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    1. Thanks! We happen to know a professional wedding photographer so we might get some classy portraits done later this year :)

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  9. OMG - Congratulations! You're both beautiful and if it feels as right as it looks, things are good. Bobby and I eloped, too, after three years of living together - it just felt right that the event was about the two of us alone. Some people were hurt, some were pissed (you may not be able to avoid that), but we'd do it that way again a thousand times over.

    Well done - best wishes for a long life together filled with much love and laughter.

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    1. Thank you darling! I think it is possible we bruised a few feelings but I hope in the end everyone will understand why we did it the way we did it. Love to you!

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  10. you look so happy. which is the only key.

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  11. Wow, congratulations. You guys do look happy.

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  12. Congratulations, joy and cheers to you both!

    These are just the dearest photos. True happiness.

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  13. Replies
    1. Thank you Reb, Lyle and Michelle! It was a fun afternoon -- felt like a caper.

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  14. Congratulations! You looked (& smelled, thanks for letting us know) incredible and full of love. So much light!

    I've never been the biggest fan of "husband" & "wife" either, but was charmed into an appreciation by this Modern Love column.

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    1. I think I will get over the words. I've actually been calling my mother-in-law my mother-in-law for quite a while. That's how I think of her!

      Can't wait to see you soon!

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  15. Congrats, E! <3 I'm baking a wedding cake for you and eating it in your honor! xxoo

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  16. You look beautiful! Congratulations!

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  17. Congratulations, Elisa! I loved your photos, especially the one of you kissing your, well, husband. Partner? Your pretty mister? (You both looked very pretty, by the way!!)

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    Replies
    1. Thank you! What the hell, let's call him my husband.

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  18. Congratulations to both of you! Husband/wife isn't the worst possible naming convention (I hate old(er) man and wife).

    The official status means nothing (if not to count some legal sides) so I wish you just to keep being happy together.

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    1. Oh, I hate old man too. And not a big fan of "DH"

      Thank you so much for the well wishes :)

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  19. Congratulations! You both look happy. And forget romantic circumstances; elopement by definition is romantic, methinks.

    And "husband" sounds fantastic if you say it in your huskiest voice and picture it coming out like "huzzband." You can do it, I know.

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  20. holy shit! I had missed this. Congratulations.

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